For a long while, I didn’t care much about having orgasms. They were sort of nice, but not so nice that I wanted to have them all the time. In fact, it kind of took a lot of effort to get there. Using vibrators helped, but even then, I didn’t feel like the effort was worth those few seconds of pleasure. I had been wondering if I needed to try a wand perhaps, as everyone seemed to be raving about those. I had also been quite fascinated and aroused by gifs of wands being pressed against a woman’s clit to force orgasms but wands are expensive and I couldn’t justify buying one.
Late birthday present
So then this package from Liam arrived. It wasn’t a surprise as he had told me it was my birthday present (from months ago), which he’d been too afraid to actually gift me. As he told me this, he didn’t exactly succeed at keeping the surprise a surprise so when I opened the box it was indeed a mains powered wand!
With the wand in my lap, I wasn’t sure if I should wait for Lois to come back online to try it. We didn’t really have a rule in place which said I had to ask her to orgasm but I didn’t feel like I should have pleasure if it wasn’t for her. I concluded that I should try it anyway because recently she had been pushing for me to find a way to enjoy my orgasms more; she had wanted me to be more curious and drawn towards them. So when my flatmate left, I plugged it in and had a go.
Well, it had never been easier to have an orgasm! It felt so good and I’m sorry to add to the cliche but I’m definitely on board the ‘wands are really great’ train. I think it works well for me because it stimulates such a wide area. I couldn’t turn it up higher than the lowest setting though, because I am way too sensitive but it really did not matter, it was great!
A new fun idea
A day or so later, Lois came online and asked me if I had tried the wand yet. I think she and Liam talked about it beforehand. He must have confessed to her that he’d bought the gift but never gave it to me and she must have suggested or told him it was about time he’d send it my way. She seemed happy that I had tried it but also had a new… fun… idea…
She suggested I should put the hot sauce all over the head of the wand, then press the wand against my clit and keep it there until I had come two times. She suggested it instead of telling me because she wasn’t sure if it was something I could handle, considering my history with the hot sauce. If you didn’t read about that, I essentially put one drop of it on my clit, freaked out and ran to the bathroom to try and wash it off (without asking first) and when that didn’t work, desperately tried to press my clit against the cold tiles of the bathroom floor (which did not help) lol. You can read about all of that here.
I wondered if I would be able to cope with the inescapability of this idea. I say I wondered, but I was pretty sure it would be nothing but torture. I wanted to do it because I wanted to make her happy and the idea, while scary, also turned me on. It felt like this was another opportunity to serve and make her happy. We talked it over and decided to go ahead with it. She said this would be my punishment for forgetting to call her ‘Miss’ the other day and that it was indeed also a great opportunity for me to please her.
I pointed out that I wouldn’t be able to keep the wand pressed against my clit myself; there is only so much masochism in me. For one, I couldn’t do it without the hot sauce after coming once because of my sensitivity and two… that sauce…
She told me to put on my tightest trousers and to push the wand through the zipper opening. I thought that was quite a clever idea as this way it stayed perfectly in place. It was so tight that there was essentially no movement of the wand possible and I didn’t need to hold it. She also told me to handcuff my hands behind my back, through the pipe of the radiator. My handcuffs have the safety unlock thingy so it would be easy enough to undo it, but I wasn’t allowed to until I had come two times.
Preparing the task
Just before this started, we turned on video chat and I and positioned my laptop so that she could clearly see my full body in the frame.
Just opening the bottle of sauce disgusts me. I have started to associate the smell with… well… lots of pain? and I dread it. I absolutely dread it. In fact, it scares me and somehow I still haven’t thrown the bottle away.
I opened the bottle and used a q-tip to spread the sauce on the head of the wand, very slowly, looking at it with some kind of blurriness in my eyes. I showed her the head of the wand and I think she told me to add some more. I had pre-positioned the handcuffs in front of the radiator and sat down in front of it naked (apart from the tight green trousers that I was wearing).
I looked at the screen of my laptop- the webcam, feeling very nervous and then pushed the wand through the open zipper. It was kind of difficult because it was very tight and during the several seconds that it took me, the burning had already started and it was touching the surrounding areas too, not just my clit!
Once it was in place, I attached one handcuff around one wrist and then looked at the screen again.
I had to turn it on now… I had to turn the wand on… I really needed to finish this process before it became too painful for me to do it. I forced myself to start the wand, attached the other handcuff and then kind of sunk down into my sitting position.
When the burning is unbearable…
Immediately, I started squinting my eyes shut. I opened my mouth to control my breathing, but my breathing became a lot quicker very fast. It’s really hard to describe the feeling of the sauce and even more so when it’s pressed against your clit while vibrating / and simultaneously also touching other areas. It’s so intense and inescapable. I wanted to try and adjust my position. I tried to move my arms but there wasn’t much moving room. Instead, it just meant I moved further into a lying position which was more uncomfortable. I tried to move my body in different directions to see if it would release any of the pressure but it didn’t. I tried to pull at the handcuffs with my wrists – as if trying to escape would offer some sort of relief, ha – There wasn’t any logic behind it. I just needed to get away from this agony!
Within a minute, I realised that I would never be able to come because the feeling of the sauce was too intense and painful; it didn’t even allow any build. All I could do was look at the webcam, helpless and I decided I would just try my best and cope with the situation regardless. I mean, I had to.
The pain and the burning stayed pretty consistent, though slowly its intensity seemed to increase. My ability to cope came in waves, which changed every minute, if not 30 seconds or so. I’d go from… I can do this, it’s fine, to feeling completely unable to deal with the feeling. My eyes would close, my mouth would widen in a silent scream and tears threatened to form in the corner of my eyes. Then I’d open my eyes again momentarily, look at the webcam, my bookshelf, my desk, my bed, all to distract myself until the wave changed and I went back to closing my eyes in an attempt to shut out the world to try and cope. There was nothing I could do but be in this current moment. I felt the pain and there was no escape.
This went on for a long time; I don’t remember how long, but it felt long. At some point, Lois told me I could undo the handcuffs now as she had also realised I wouldn’t be able to come like this and it had been enough.
It felt like such a relief to remove the wand and at the same time everything was still on fire and burning without pause. I worried a bit because I hadn’t completed the original task of coming twice, but she said it was okay and that coming wasn’t the real goal as much as me doing this, and that she’d enjoyed seeing me in so much pain. She said I surprise her every time and I felt really happy for having been able to serve her like this.
That evening I was attending a fancy postgraduate dinner with two of my friends. One of them was on the committee so we had free tickets wooo. I asked Lois for advice on which dress to wear and without attuning to each other first, we agreed on the same one.
I mentioned that the burning wasn’t going to stop and she tried to assure me it wouldn’t be that bad; it would calm down, just like it did last time.
Weelllll it didn’t stop! And sitting down at the dinner table with my legs closed together (because dress) it kept on burning to the point where I kept switching from trying to move my legs further apart to having them closed again, as I felt someone might notice.
Before leaving my house, I told her I hoped she enjoyed the thought I would be in pain all night and at the dinner table, this thought amused me, precisely because I was struggling. When we got up to leave dinner at maybe 9 PM, it was agony to walk home in heels. I kept wanting to reach out for my crotch but my friends were with me and we were out in public, but oh my god.
When I came home at around 10 PM, I took a shower in an attempt to remove the burning feeling, which was a mistake as I could have known, because the water only intensified it. Luckily though, I managed to fall asleep at some point (in bed, not the shower, lol) and in the morning, the burning had finally stopped.
I washed my trousers and tried to clean the wand as best as I could but to this day, it burns every time I use it. The sauce has left a ghostly trace of its burning qualities. It’s much less intense but it still burns! I tried everything. Water, pee, alcohol, toy cleaner… Nothing helped. I was quite sad knowing that this new great gift of pleasure now also meant burning, but I supposed it amused Lois, knowing this and perhaps any other person I’d serve in the future so I thought, maybe it’s not so bad after all? Maybe…
Well, I recently got a Doxy and I couldn’t be happier! It must have been well over a year and a half since Liam gave me the other wand and now I finally have a non-burning one, weeheee!
Xx Marie Louise