This is a very short post (being published on a Sunday for that reason), and this report was in fact already published on Fetlife. I am posting it here too because it’s going to be relevant to the post that will be published next Wednesday.
I complained to Miss Lois how I had to call a call centre to fix a certain problem I had with ordering some pair of shoes that Miss Lois had told me to get. I had to call as they didn’t have an online chat help centre (yet?) (like, come on. We live in 2019.) And so she was like… hehehe, I have a great new task for you then. (That’s my impersonation of her giving me all these evil tasks.)
So yeah, I think having to call, call centres, or anyone, really, is unpleasant. I either prefer text messages or talking to someone in person. There’s just something about talking on the phone that makes me anxious, and I know there are a lot of people from my generation that feel the same way.
So naturally, at 10 PM, Miss Lois told me to call this call centre while naked, with a but plug in and wearing my stilettos, and to then submit a report. By this point, she had just started talking to my best friend, (which will be the topic for the blog post that is published next Wednesday, about a shared chat between us three) and she told him to transcribe my hand-written report and that it was both our responsibility to get the report to her by 6 PM the following day.
This certainly gave me the right ‘motivation’ to call sooner rather than later, setting myself the task to do it before noon.
That night, I slept wearing a pair of panties and a pyjama shirt. The report was as follows:
“So, I got up this morning, put on the stilettos, took my clothes and Fitbit off, inserted the butt plug and sat down at my desk to call. (Before sitting down at my desk I took a picture.)
The only thing I felt was… The butt plug hurts as it did last night. I have some … issues at the moment.
God it is cold, very cold, and okay, I just need to call.
Oh, and I wasn’t very wet before inserting the butt plug. I was only just a little wet. It certainly was not enough to lubricate the plug.
So, I called and did not have to wait! I explained the problem (I couldn’t check out somehow) and he asked me to try it again to see if it worked today, but the discount is was longer there today. (Miss Lois told me to order these items yesterday because there was a lot of discounts.)
So, I tell him that I don’t want to order all these items anymore, so he says they’ll apply the discount from yesterday for me, so I don’t have to worry – it is very cold.
He needs to do something so he leaves me on hold for a bit. This song starts playing in my head that goes like ‘guess I should walk away, guess I should walk away but I just can’t seem to get a grip woohoo these are the last- ‘.
So he comes back and also needs to know my name and email address and then he says that I should email their support with x info and the picture I have of the order I tried placing last night (because of the discount) and that they will then get back to me and use a support chat instead (IT DOES EXIST??)
The guy on the line… every time he asks me to wait for like 10 seconds, he then returns and says “thank you for your patience while staying on hold.”
It seems way to overly polite and pointless to me so I wish he would just get on with it because I am cold.
Anyway, that was the end of the call. I don’t feel anything really. Not in a negative sense but doing this was just like a job I simply had to do? It was just a simple phone call. (Idk guys, my anxiety just wasn’t there somehow.)
Afterwards, I composed the email and sent it off, took another picture of myself, took out the plug, dressed and curled up under my heating blanket while writing this.
Also, I was less wet after the call. I was barely wet at all.
According to my phone, I started the call at 8.58 AM and the call lasted 11 minutes.”
So somehow, this call which Miss Lois tried to make less mundane, was in fact super mundane to me, apart from being cold! I enjoyed the thought of my best friend having to transcribe it though because I knew he would feel embarrassed knowing that I’d been naked and worn a butt plug while calling this call centre. And you might not know this about me, but I love teasing people, hehe. About which you’ll get to read more in the post on Wednesday!
(c) Do not use any of the material on this blog, pictures or content for any form of publication whether fiction, film, psychological research etc. without contacting me and asking me for my permission.