(I forgot that it was Wednesday yesterday lol, so am posting this on a Thursday woo)
16-12-2018
I had gone home for part of December for Christmas and was staying at my mum’s place when Miss Lois messaged me. I was building a Harry Potter Lego castle lol. She said that she’d been hoping to play with me for a little bit, but that I seemed happily occupied. Of course, I said I could go upstairs. Lego is fun but Miss Lois is way more fun.
Upstairs she said that we were looking for things/items to either push me, to train me or to please her.
I looked around the attic… my mum has many, many things that are partly packed in a lot of boxes and partly just shoved aside and hidden in drawers and such. I had no idea what we were looking for so I started sending Miss Lois pictures of everything. The shelves, the inside of drawers, boxes etc. I sent her about 30 different pictures. To the best of my knowledge, none of the items was useful in any way.
Then I found a speculum lol! (Definitely wondered why Mum had one of those?)
Naturally, she told me to keep the speculum out… as well as what turned out to be a tampon inserter and an epilator (why… I thought…) (to be fair I thought it was a normal shaving instrument at first lol)
Then I found a box of clothespins on the other side of the room. She asked me where I’d found it, as it hadn’t been on the side where we were currently looking and then told me not to roam and stay focused on where we were (although I had to keep them). She asked me how stiff they were and I wasn’t sure how to tell her so she told me to put it on my nipple.
I felt like they were stiffer than normal clothes pins. It was already burning. She told me to try and pull it off without opening it.
I didn’t manage but the pain had started burning 3 times as much.
She told me to do it again and show her how hard I could pull them off without them coming off. (God do I hate nipple pain.)
After looking around some of the final boxes and not finding much else she told me to try the epilator out on my bikini hair and to tell her how well it worked.
It didn’t really manage to grab a hold of many hairs. They were probably too long (phew, saved for now!)
We then went back to looking in boxes that had a lot of cables (added one of those pictures with the other 3 items above).
She had also told me to watch a video (link) and to watch what they were doing with the electric cables. Oh… is that what I’m going to…
Miss Lois: “You will pick three different widths of cable. The thin ones where you can see two cables, the slightly bigger one and the thick round one. You will do what the girl in the video does and then tell me which hurts more.”
She told me to make a loop with them because I could use them to hit myself harder that way. The white one hurt the most.
Miss Lois: “Is your bottom red?”
Me: “Not really Miss.”
Miss Lois: “What does that mean in your opinion?”
(#embarrassed)
Me: “I must not be hitting hard enough, Miss.”
Miss Lois: “I’ll tell you a trick. When you swing and decide on how hard you’re swinging I want you to purely focus on the goal of creating a red mark and nothing else.”
That worked a little bit.
She then wanted me to try and focus on getting wetter and letting that thought decide how hard I swung.
I had also become a lot wetter now. She asked if I liked the pain. I guessed so? I liked the idea of hurting for her.
She said to do hit myself 5 times now to decide after each time if I thought it hurt enough, and my answer would decide how hard I’d hit myself the next time.
I mean… it never seemed hard enough so I felt like I had to do it harder each time. It didn’t quite work out for the 5 times, because it wasn’t easy to hit myself well consistently so I did it a few more times than that.
I had now almost starting to drip from wetness, but it had been caught on the inside of my leg. She asked me how I was feeling and I felt like… that it had lately been feeling right every time we tried something new and that we were touching upon my nature as a slave by doing so, which made me feel good. And it made me feel like I wanted to go further.
Miss Lois: “Very well, then I want you to do 20 hard ones now.”
These hits made me feel like I needed to pause in between. I tried not to though, of course.
She asked me again how wet I was but I didn’t know how one could be wetter than dripping wet, which I definitely was.
Miss Lois: “The thing is, I want you to have some bruises as a reminder for a few days and you’re not there yet. You need to do another 20.”
I mentioned that I didn’t think another 20 would be enough to accomplish that because it was really hard to continuously hit the same spot. (Side note: it’s really hard to hit yourself because there is this fear of the pain so there is a lot of hesitation that you need to conquer somehow?)
She said that she liked my dedication a lot and that I could try as often as I liked and to send her a picture once I was happy with the result.
Me: “What if I never reach a point of being happy with the result?”
Miss Lois: “Reaching the point of being happy with the result
or unable to go on because of the pain will both be a success.”
After 10 minutes or so, I said something that indicated I wasn’t quite satisfied but also didn’t know how to change it exactly (because it’s really hard to inflict pain on yourself!) I said that it simply looked red and that I didn’t think it was changing a lot.
(Looking at the picture now, right after I’ve seen the others I can definitely see a change haha. Funny how I didn’t think I’d made any change in the moment.)
She suggested I stop using the cable as a loop and use just a single one and to make a knot or two at the end. I could also choose to keep the loop and make two knots in there.
This made it a lot easier to hit harder. It now also felt like there was a specific spot on my body that was stinging more than the rest.
She told me to attach 5 big paperclips, which she’d seen on one of the pictures I’d taken of some drawers.
She said to do another 20 hits, which by now became a bit of a struggle. It didn’t really show up in terms of colour though. But I didn’t know how to do it better on my own. It was quite awkward hitting myself in terms of swinging the cord.
I had to have dinner now, as I’d told Miss Lois on beforehand. I was expected downstairs. She asked me how long dinner would take, which was 30 minutes at most and to make a crotch rope with some wire to wear during dinner. I was allowed to take the wire off after dinner.
My butt was feeling as if it had some sort of burning patch on it. The crotch wire was very uncomfortable. But sitting down at the dinner table made it even more uncomfortable. Both in terms of how the physical wire felt and in terms of being at the dinner table with Mum and her boyfriend.
Sitting down on my butt also hurt. But I liked that it stung when sitting down. I had always thought that I’d dislike the part after play the most, when the pain would be lingering, but it turned out that I didn’t. The reminder is very nice.
Miss Lois said she had to go soon now as she was invited for a dinner but she told me to see if we owned any hot sauce of perhaps Vaporub. As it turns out, we had neither, but of course, we did have tiger balm.
Back upstairs she wanted me to show her my bum again and to put my clit in between the wire.
By this point, I could have taken the wire off as dinner was over, but I liked it and decided to keep it on, without her telling me to.
Of course, what followed was having to put tiger balm on my clit.
It started to burn and gradually increased. When I sat down it burned more because of the wire, while standing up it burned less.
With the applicator, she told me to insert some tiger balm up my bum. (So that’s what you can use them for, huh…)
I started feeling the heat the second it went up my bum. It burned a lot more in my bum compared to the burning of my clit. But it didn’t cancel out the burning on the clit.
She then told me to take a picture in my heels while smiling, as practise to look elegant and pretty no matter what goes on inside. Whether pain or otherwise. It took about 15 pictures before it was good enough, haha. She said I looked very sweet. She told me that this was how I should always pose for pictures. With a smile with an open mouth.
The burning in my bum was still quite intense but the burning on my clit had gone down. She mentioned how this was nowhere close to my limit though, to which I agreed. Then suddenly…
Me: “Mum’s coming up.”
Miss Lois: “Haha, hide.”
I duck under the covers of my bed, pretending I’d just been chilling in bed all along.
Me: “O God, she’s sitting down on the end of the bed.”
Luckily she only stayed for 3 minutes before leaving again.
I guess Miss Lois wasn’t going to leave for dinner after all because she told me to get 6 of the clothespins and the bandage tape. She wanted me to attach two to each side of my labia and to tape them to my thigh so my clit would be exposed.
Then she told me to use some rubber bands to squeeze the cord together so that it’d squeeze the clit in between the wires. It made my clit super sensitive.
Naturally… she then told me to use the thick rubber band and pull and flick it making me hit my clit…
By this point, I asked if I could get a towel to put underneath me on the bed in case I started dripping from wetness. Of course, this was okay.
She wanted me to touch my clit and to see if I could get aroused by it. I didn’t really know what it felt like to be aroused? We always knew by checking how wet I was. So judging by that, I was definitely aroused haha.
She told me to keep touching it to try and orgasm but it just hurt a lot. I didn’t know how to push through the pain enough to get anywhere because I just couldn’t force my hand to keep on touching my really sensitive clit.
After 25 minutes I had squirted about five times but I wasn’t able to cum. (I was still on my meds which seemed to make me incapable of cumming.)
However, she said I’d done very well as I’d squirted a lot. I mean… the towel definitely hadn’t been enough to catch all of it…
I asked her what I had done wrong earlier. The thing she had wanted me to confess.
She said that she thought she’d seen some hair on my nipples, which I was supposed to always keep clean off hair according to one of our rules.
I said that I thought I had taken all of them off when I shaved my legs and armpits 2 days ago, but that maybe I’d miss some and that I was sorry if I had.
She told me to look now to see if she was right and I had to admit there were two sorts of visible hairs… and that she was right.
As a punishment, I now was to wear my heels every day until I went to my dad, including wearing them on the train. (Yes, I still felt anxious about wearing heels, lol.)
By 11 pm she said she had to go and we wished each other a good night.
Xx MLSlavePuppet
That was quite the session. I’m not really good at hurting myself. I can take what my Queen dishes out but I don’t want to have to do it to myself.
Honestly I don’t particularly want to do it myself? I mean I never thought I wanted a dynamic like this online and that I would stick to it for as long as I did and enjoyed it as much as I did but it just sort of happens? But doing it yourself, doing all the things yourself tbh is a lot harder in a way because it requires you to fight your own natural impulse of fighting against the pain. In a way I feel like it shouldn’t matter because if that’s what’s required of me I’ll do it, but ideally in the future I’d also rather have it done to me haha
I get it. I suppose if I were being dommed that way I would do it too and likely find it exciting. Thankfully I am punished by someone near and dear to me! ?
Haha, lucky you! ?
Pingback: Part 2: Squirting through a Speculum – MLSlavePuppet
What a delicious session! Too bad your Mistress could not be there with you.
I am familiar with what both of you are saying. It’s really difficult to cause yourself serious pain, even for those of us with the masochistic side. Except maybe when you are trying something for the first time and you don’t really know what to expect from it. Several years ago I dealt an experimental hard blow with a piece o thick rubber hose to the sole of my right foot. Boy did that hurt, my eyes watered and I had hard time suppressing my howl. The red stripe and the throbbing pain took hours to completely vanish. I couldn’t do it again, lol.
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