In addition to my punishment for not wearing the heels at the airport, I needed to be punished for two other mistakes I’d made just before my departure to the new country.
- I had disobeyed a direct order to send Miss Lois a picture and tried to start a conversation about it first, which she specifically told me not to do. Then, afterwards, I also made the wrong picture, which wasn’t what she had asked for.
- I had forgotten to call her ‘Miss’ one time when I should have.
For the punishments, she’d told me to suggest three punishments that she could pick from, and one of those had been for me to wear a butt plug all day. It was one of the punishments I had hoped she wouldn’t pick. But then I guess that’s exactly why it should have been a punishment.
“OK, so to your punishments. The first I will take from your three. You will wear a butt plug all day. You are allowed to take it out for 5 mins every hour when you think you need to, and for going to the toilet. You will spend at least 2hours in town or outside the house where there are people, ideally longer. You will also speak to at least two different people while you are wearing it. You are allowed to try and fix it in in any way you can come up with. Tight knickers or even a crotch rope.”
Some people wear butt plugs all the time, every day as a subtle reminder. But for me, as everything seemed to do at the start of my training (lol), the idea of wearing one all day was slightly frightening.
For one I worried about what if it would come out while I was outside. Secondly, what if anyone would notice even though there’d be no way they could see. Thirdly, what if I had to go to the toilet? I can’t pee when wearing one. And also… surely it must be uncomfortable to wear one all the time?
Here’s the rapport I wrote about it at the time:
I hope it’s okay I start writing the report while the day is still going on. It’s now 12.39 and I think I have been to the toilet 4 times now since, which is really annoying because I don’t really want to take the butt plug out and put it back in. It makes it more painful. I have to go to the toilet constantly when I’m nervous and I guess today wearing a butt plug also classes as me being nervous. Plus the thought of how I shouldn’t go to the toilet, of course, makes me have to go more often. After you left this morning I lied in bed for a bit, went downstairs to pump up the tires of my bike, ran into my flatmate and couldn’t break away from conversation for a while and sat down at the kitchen table. He asked me if I was going on a date since I was going to town and no, I wasn’t, duh. I mean… I’m currently wearing a butt plug for someone… lol. If only he knew. So I had some toast myself and felt a bit self-conscious opening my cupboard because it meant facing my flatmate with my back and while I know the butt plug isn’t visible, what if it is?
So I will soon cycle into town to get there by 2 pm. I guess I could have chosen to take the bus but I haven’t checked the time table at all. Walking too is very weird. When it hurts or is particularly noticeable I think ‘why?’ … punishment… I deserve this and then I think, it also slightly arouses me?
But it’s only one o clock and it already hurts now so by the end of this day…
At the same time, I like how I can wear this without anyone noticing and how I’m literally carrying something that reminds me of you and this lifestyle while interacting with ‘normal’ life. However, I am dreading going into town. Wish I could simply not move and sit still like a statue today.
It’s about 8 pm now. The butt plus is sort of throbbing. I think it has been doing that for a looong while. So I cycled to town and sort of sitting down on the saddle pushed the plug in like extra far which kinda hurt, but was okay at first. Except for the cycling, roads aren’t exactly even or flat here so going over bumps and stuff was… great. Then I figured out that if I just only lean sit on the vagina bit, the plug isn’t as painful except by then that really didn’t make a difference anymore. Usually, I’m super aware of how far I am and how long I have left to go, but on the way to town, it’s like bits of the route have disappeared out of my memory.
So I got to town and went to Tesco to buy some wet wipes, then went to the place where I was supposed to meet my friend and then the plug suddenly came out… I thought I had secure it with a crotch rope but… aahh
So I went looking for a toilet instead of waiting for her. I found the library but couldn’t get in because I forgot to bring my student card so I had to wait for my friend to arrive.
I fixed the butt plug on the toilet except I guess the crotch rope wasn’t tight enough because it felt like it wanted to slip right out again but I didn’t think I could already go back to the toilet soo for the rest of the afternoon I kinda just pulled at the rope or literally held it in place with my hand. In the library, we talked to someone explaining the printers or something and then we walked over to the students union because of the societies fair. There were so many people. Like you couldn’t walk. Which was kind of convenient really because it meant the plug stayed in better. But there were so many people and there were three stories as well. We walked past all 100+ societies and talked to a few people.
Afterwards, my friend cancelled the sports thingy we were going to do (thank god) and we went to an ice cream place instead. (I just sneezed and have very much been reminded of this plug and it’s very unpleasant haha.) and then we sat at the ice cream place until about 5. It was nice to talk about whatever, but at the same time, I was wondering when I could get out of there because of the plug so a bit after 5 we parted.
I tried to find another toilet then (the Tesco here is too small to have one). Turns out the public one costs 30p (why are toilets no longer free??) so I bought a cookie in Subway to get change. I then finally managed to go to a toilet where I took it out for 5 minutes and then tied the crotch rope very tightly, a bit too tightly, but at least I could walk after without worrying if it would slip out or not.
Cycling home was more painful than cycling to town. The way back is always crappy because the wind is really strong. But since the butt plug pain was there cycling wasn’t as bad as usual.
After getting off my bike, the butt plug feeling was fine haha, for a bit anyway.
I made my own food while my flatmate did the same and then I sat down again for a while (not pleasant). We talked for an hr or so and then I went upstairs for a shower. I didn’t take the plug out but removed the crotch rope but left the underwear because the plug doesn’t really stay in place on its own.
Afterwards, I put the crotch rope back on and some pyjama bottoms.
I went to the toilet 30 min ago and I feel like I need to go again. It’s 9 pm. Ugh.
It hurts. I think I’ve also been pretty aroused all day, although I still don’t quite notice unless I check. I felt a bit self-conscious about other people being able to see but not massively. Had a conversation in my head with imaginary you where I was like ‘I’ve normalised it in my head so all these strangers and my friends, I don’t care what they think plus they don’t know and can’t see anyway’ – to which your response might have been: ‘but what girls walk around with a butt plug all day and secure it with a crotch rope?’ and so on.
It’s so uncomfortable and there- I want it to stop being there but at the same time I know it’s my punishment and it’s good it’s uncomfortable and there and that I’m suffering because I deserve this punishment. I’ll feel a little relieved that I’ve paid for part of my sins? After today. Looking forward to that more than getting this plug out.
9.30 pm: I’m actually pretty tired because I woke up relatively early for me when I sleep late-ish. But I need to at least make it to 10. Don’t really know what to do with myself either, wearing this plug. I should probably fold my laundry, maybe.
I’ve also had imaginary you tell me to embrace the pain, several times today, including now. I hate sitting down. Also pulling it out and then putting it back in is terrible, although pushing it in arouses me every time, it seems.
10.15: Is it cheating to lie down? Part of me actually feels like I should just keep sitting and embrace the pain because this is my punishment. Also, I don’t want to move. I’ll go fold my laundry.
10.30: I’d take it out and try to go to sleep now except they’ve just decided to take a bath so it will be a while before I can use the bathroom. Side note, lying down on your back does not help.
11.10: They’re still in there.
So I went to the toilet 4 times between 10 and 1.20, then 2 times between 1.30 and 7.30 and used 5 minutes without the plug and went to the toilet 2 more times between 7.30 and now.
He just left the bathroom yay – no he went back whyyy. Not a single position has made it feel any better this evening. I still need to brush my teeth too first ugh. I’m not trying to complain to you, I’m really just talking to myself.
23.30 It’s out.
I felt relieved after completing the day, and a bit lighter the next day for having paid for some of my sins. I did not, at all, feel the desire to wear a butt plug for a longer time again any time soon. Yet at the same time, the idea also aroused me. It surprised me how much it aroused me to insert the butt plug every time. It sent instant shivers of arousal through me every time, regardless of how it also tends to hurt every time.
I also certainly felt the desire to only please Miss Lois and stop making these mistakes. I hated feeling like I’d done wrong and needed to be punished.