Discovering Kink as a Child

I am aware that this is a controversial topic and I believe it is for a good reason. It is important to have the age of consent to protect minors so that they cannot be taken advantage of and that is also why BDSM and kink are only allowed to be engaged in once you are 18+ (though the age of consent is different in each country). However, there are quite a few stories of people that rolled into this Continue Reading →

Why do you need contraception? You’re a lesbian

You would not believe how often I received the response, “Why do you use the pill? You don’t need it.” (So often in fact that I’m worried all of you will go, ‘erm, yes… you don’t need the pill, you’re gay.’) Even more curious is that I don’t just get this question from men. Women also ask me why I need to use contraception as if it’s a bad thing. I don’t get it. All women know/have experienced the pain Continue Reading →

Learning that I am allowed to exist

For years, I struggled with the idea of my own existence. I didn’t want to be alive and didn’t think I should exist. I preferred to be invisible and part of that meant to never wear anything too nice. I admired women that looked fashionable from a distance, whether they were wearing make-up, trousers, skirts, dresses and/or heels. They seemed so confident and at peace with who they were. I wasn’t anything like that, though deep down inside, I felt Continue Reading →

“You can breathe” – Letting go and Moving forwards

April 2015 I can describe us with an endless list of songs. I can see her in everything she has ever talked about. She used to be my first thought in the morning and my last thought when I went to bed. She didn’t even leave me in my dreams. She was always there, with me, in my head, but hasn’t been with me for 8 months. I used to count the minutes after the last time she responded. That Continue Reading →

My Kinky Fantasies

I’ve been dreaming of kinky shenanigans for yeaaars. And I mean years because while I’m only 24-years old, I knew I was into kink just as I entered secondary school. Of course, I was way too young to be allowed to be into kink and so I had to stick to my fantasies. Sometimes these fantasies would include me playing with dolls or lego and making up some kinky story in which the main character, based on me, duh, would Continue Reading →

Dreaming of being Collared

I’m going to start this post off with a little anecdote. I had a lot of internet friends when I was younger (guess I am part of the generation that literally grew up with the internet). And two of these friends and I were part of a bigger group of people that were making videos together. Not in person, we all lived in different countries. My friends ran the group and had added me even though I was quite adamant Continue Reading →

Conquering fear: Attending my first BDSM event

I used to be afraid of accepting the BDSM/kinky part of myself without truly knowing that I was afraid. I always knew that I was into BDSM and that I wanted to live my life in that lifestyle with someone I could submit to. I absolutely believed in this. I never doubted this. It was way more certain than my sexuality until I figured out I was gay. Yet, I didn’t know I was a slave until Miss Lois truly started helping me open up and exploring this identity of mine. Continue Reading →

A small Christmas gift

I don’t remember how or why I thought of this, but I thought it’d be fun and nice idea to wish Miss Lois a happy Christmas by writing it on my body and taking a picture of my naked body. I wanted it to be a bit more special though and not only write it with a black marker. So I went to the shops and looked for coloured marker pens, which were luckily fairly easy to find. Continue Reading →

How Miss Lois and I met

I was roaming around on Collarspace, not particularly looking for anything or anyone but a distraction. I have to admit that I was still a bit sad and getting over my (mostly vanilla) relationship that had ended a few months ago. But more than that, I was searching to fill the void of the missing kink in my life. I knew I was submissive and I knew I wanted to find a Domme to serve, but I didn’t know where to find it. Continue Reading →

Losing a Mistress… Losing purpose…

In reality, if our relationship had developed enough by then, and she would have wanted it too, I would have chosen to go to the university in her city (and the master would have been fine. I mean, how much do these masters really matter? or degrees, really? It’s not going to help me get a job. The only reason I’m doing them is because I enjoy studying and developing my mind). Continue Reading →

Documenting my journey of becoming a slave

I’ve known that I identify as a submissive for as long as I can remember (discounting the early years of childhood as I can’t remember them). I had a boyfriend when I was 10/11, and I suggested we tie each other up to tickle one another – and we used a tea towel as a blindfold. Once we broke up, I’d sit in my room sometimes, untie the shoelaces from my shoes and use them to tie my hands together. Continue Reading →