Are You There?

I’m not here.

I’m not here anymore.

I can’t hear you.

I can’t hear you right now.

 

No.

I’m not here.

I’m not.

 

‘I can’t…’

be here

I’m not

I’m not

 

‘I don’t want to…’

can’t 

be

 

I can’t be here anymore.

 


Hello depression my old friend ~
This was earlier this week. I’m all good now, this happens all the time.
Great image came from it though, if I say so myself.

Seriously though, I’m fine! Expression helps u know.

My favourite picture from last week is this one this one.
Check out other people’s entries this week by clicking on the lips below!

Xx Marie Louise

Sinful Sunday
(c) Do not use any of the material on this blog, pictures or content for any form of publication whether fiction, film, psychological research etc. without contacting me and asking me for my permission.

35 Replies to “Are You There?”

  1. Never Waste a Dirty Mind

    Kudos, Marie Louise, for posting this. For showing the dark moments too. For showing that yours is not a perfect world that consists exclusively of butt canings, clamped labia and a hot sauce covered clit.

    I know you work hard to manage your depression and that it has taken a lot of effort to get where you are today. I would like to ask, if I may, how you manage, when depression strikes? Can you dissociate and function on some level? Going to class, shop, cook, going through the motions of life, or do you just isolate yourself and wait for it to lift? And while you are in it, can you tell yourself that it will pass, that you will get out on the other side, or does everything just look bleak and hopeless?

    It is a great picture and you do have a very attractive model to work with. But talk about suffering for your art!

    All the best,
    Henrik

    Reply
    • MLSlavePuppet Post author

      Haha I had to laugh about your sum up of the fun things in my life. But yes, I find it really important not to wear that mask.

      It’s always different how I manage it and depends on how bad it is. I need to feel useful, so if I am productive this can often help, but of course, it’s really hard to be productive when you’re feeling like that.

      I need to listen to myself, so on some days I need to accept that the day isn’t going to be productive and I try to be kind by myself and allow myself to watch a series or play a game. Just do things that I can do.

      Sometimes it’s so bad that the only way I can get through is by distracting myself. If I watch a series and the episode comes to and end, unless I watch the next one immediately I fall right back into that breakdown and the suicidal thoughts.

      The problem is that when I dissociate I am no longer myself. Nothing looks real and familiar, though I know it is familiar. I know that I don’t want to die and that these thoughts aren’t who I really am, but it feels so real and I don’t know how to get out of it, though I’m aware that it is happening.

      The only thing I manage to do when I’m like that is going to football. That’s such a set thing in my system that I will always go. Sometimes football can get me out of it, but it’s a 50/50 chance.

      Sometimes I do believe I will get out of it, sometimes I don’t.

      Reply
  2. Molly

    You are right, it did inspire a very good photo that definitely speaks to your feelings at the time. I am glad you are feeling better now though, it is horrible to be in that place

    molly

    Reply
  3. missy

    I am glad to hear that you are feeling a bit better and sorry that you feel like this sometimes. I think it is brave of you and also important to post about as it lets others see how it can be for some people. This is a lovely picture of you – I am very glad that you are here 🙂

    Reply
  4. bluesubmission

    Love this photo and the angle of your body. I was here last week too and really wanted a bath, but my tub was too dirty. That did not help my mood lol! Glad to hear you’re on the other side now.

    Reply
  5. kisungura

    I can relate, and I’m glad you rode this wave and harnessed it to capture such beauty and creativity, sending support your way if you want it x

    Reply

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